“We are all faced with a series of great opportunities brilliantly disguised as impossible situations.”
~Charles R. Swindoll
It’s in there, I know it is. Underneath the mental noise, habits, and distractions, there it is, clear as day…your inner truth.
If you’ve ever been confused or wondered why you got into the same situation again for the millionth time, it might be worth your while to quiet down and listen. Your inner truth is always speaking – guiding you, pointing out the red flags, tapping you on the shoulder with clarity. The real you absolutely knows how to handle things wisely and walk the joyful path. Isn’t that amazing?
It’s simply a matter of listening.
Getting in the Way of Listening
We try way harder than necessary to figure everything out. Do you ruminate endlessly when you need to make a decision? Or get stuck in repetitive patterns that don’t serve you? Are you too busy moving forward to notice what is here now?
Listening to your inner truth is about getting out of your own way. Maybe you complicate matters by:
- Thinking you have to come up with the answers
- Moving too fast to be present
- Letting the past and future consume your attention
- Leading with should’s and have-to’s
- Doubting what you know to be true
If you are trying to get to peace, trying to find happiness, trying to make your struggles disappear, there is a simple solution.
But it is a radical one, so you need to be ready.
Discover Yourself
You are being invited to do something you may never have done before. And that is stop. Stop the analyzing, the agitated thinking. Stop spinning in doubt and frustration. Stop doing what doesn’t bring you happiness.
Just for a moment, step away from all of that. You can always pick it up later, if you want.
Take a deep, cleansing breath. Realize that you are still very much alive even though you aren’t caught in your mind. Notice space and silence. Then listen.
Instead, of barreling through at warp speed, put down all the armor, and be one with life. Because you already are. Underneath all the swirling mind activity, the pressures, the confusion is you. Unconditioned. Undisturbed. Infinitely present. Boundlessly intelligent. Vast and spacious. Crystal clear.
How to Listen
From the perspective of aware presence, the rules are different than what you are used to.
Your starting point is to inhabit the space of not knowing. It’s such a relief to say the truth: that you don’t know and you can’t figure it out. Let yourself rest here.
Then be quiet and listen. Don’t worry if your mind goes crazy. Stay as the space in which thoughts appear. Simply be present and available to what arises now.
Notice: What is your body communicating in its own special language? What insights spontaneously appear? What do you realize that you have been ignoring?
Expand in openness and receptivity. Let go of anything you might expect or hope to hear. Allow anything to show itself to you without judging it.
At this point, it’s anyone’s game. Maybe the change you need to make will become clear. Maybe you will see that resting and doing nothing is the wisest path. Maybe your urge to defend will fall away, and the most beautiful heart-filled response will appear.
Let yourself be surprised by the capacity of your natural intelligence. Then bow to it by letting it guide your actions.
It’s so simple. Listen up, and your true magnificence will shine everywhere.
What happens when you listen to your inner truth? What gets in the way? You are welcome to share…
Galen Pearl says
The opening quote is wonderful and reminds me of another favorite. When confronted by a challenging person, I sometimes remind myself, “There goes a child of God cleverly disguised as a jerk!”
Janette says
I love your quote! I know that child!
David Stevens says
Very nice Gail,
Thankyou. Taking the time to listen is time well spent. Love the photo as well.
be good to yourself
David
Gail Brenner says
Always a pleasure to hear from you, David. Sending love…
Susan says
Hello Gail,
Your message is lovely and reflects just what I have experienced in the past week. I had a week away by myself and spent much time observing nature in stillness. Several insights came to me in regard to a situation that has no solution at this time. Accepting what is and trusting that the answers will come in their own time is the main message I received.
Something else I do in difficult emotional situations with others is to take a moment and ask “What would Love do?” Then I can put my own agenda aside and act from the heart. It works out every time.
Gail Brenner says
This is great, Susan. Both sitting in stillness and listening and asking, “What would love do?” express a desire to lead from Presence and not from your mind. They both let you – with any ideas or reactions you might have – get out of the way so you can see what is actually true.
Realizing there is no solution at this time is wisdom, and trusting that the answers will come at just the right time.
Nessa says
Thank you Gail once again for your thoughtful insights. I really like the idea of coming up with ways to control or perhaps stop the ongoing and often destructive internal dialogue. I am been using your last few posts to contain my need to find answers and/or be right and it certainly has been very liberating.
At present though I am in a family situation where there is a massive amount of tension. I have been screamed at, ridiculed and bullied but I don’t know how to deal with it. If I listen to this and do not reply in a similar tone then I am accused of being smug or condescending. When I am listening to these untruths and accusations being screamed at me I feel like I am going to collapse. I see the point that these “jerks” are in fact my teachers, but how can I bear the present when they are throwing the past (or their experience of it) at me?
Once again thank you for your care, just occasionally I print out your post and keep it in my pocket and it reminds me to just be there. Blessings Nessa
Gail Brenner says
So much sweetness coming through your comment, Nessa.
Regarding the family situation, you are describing a lot of behaviors of others that you have no control over. You can’t control what they say or how they feel about you. My first question is to check inside to see if it is your truth to stay in the situation when you are being screamed at and bullied. Only you can know, but maybe the best thing is to walk away – not in anger or defense, but in wisdom and love.
Second, your job is to stay with yourself. Meet your feelings and reactions with love and understanding. Be so kind and compassionate toward yourself. Keep breathing when things are tough and imagine a group of your favorite and most supportive people surrounding you.
Third, can you meet these others with openness, with love in your heart – not being defensive or reactive? That would mean asking open and honest questions like: How did that affect you when I did that? and repeating back to make sure you understand and they feel heard. Also, saying, “I can understand that you would feel that way” and “I hear you when you say…” And then acknowledging your own behavior and apologizing as appropriate, as in “Yes, I can see that I could have been more thoughtful” or “I acknowledge that I was confused at the time.” The point here is to stay rather than flee, stay open rather than close down, and be connected even when it’s hard.
If you meet others with openness instead of resistance. you may find it remarkable how the interaction becomes more peaceful.
Please let me know how it goes. Oceans of love and support to you…
Nessa says
Thank you so much Gail, I am grateful for your help and guidance.
I managed to take those ideas to the situation and I think the outcome was much better than it could have been. Meeting my family with humility, and just going along with it made it easier for me to leave when I felt it was the right time. Sometimes I feel like that openness might appear to them as if I think their behaviour is acceptable, but that doesn’t really matter I suppose so long as I feel okay and did not retaliate.
What happens next I don’t know and I have no expectations. I am certainly open to a break from stressful family (sister) relationships.
So thanks Gail I found the truth in your words and used it as my guide. Then, I returned home, after a very long drive with my children to receive a call that my good friend and collegue had just committed suicide. Certainly I am feeling some learning journeys here.
Gail Brenner says
Hi Nessa,
I’m glad there has been a little more ease in your family situation. Oh, learning journeys… you are getting your share right now. Love and support to you…
Lisa Kuzak says
Hi Gail. It takes a lot of determination for me to pull the plug on my conditioned responses and habits that don’t serve. There is always that ocean of quiet intelligent stillness just waiting for me to notice it. I think I will put a ribbon bracelet on today to help me remember. Just a few days ago I heard an interesting saying; when faced with confusion, stress, imbalance, etc., just ask, “What would Love do?”
Thank-you, Gail, for all your help.
Lisa
Gail Brenner says
Hi Lisa,
I am in the whatever-it-takes camp. If a ribbon bracelet helps you – great! I know someone who set his watch alarm to go off every 15 minutes at first to help him be aware.
Yes, conditioned responses can have a lot of power. You may start catching yourself in them after the fact, then gradually, as being conscious strengthens, you “wake up” earlier and earlier. Eventually you feel the urge before it takes any form at all.
“What would Love do?” is an interesting question. It’s like a trick. How do you know what Love would do? You get quiet and access the intelligence within you. It’s a way to help you connect with what is true inside.
Beautiful journey you are describing, Lisa. So much love and support to you…