“Let yourself be silently drawn by the stronger pull of what you really love.”
~Rumi
Sometimes things are so obvious, and so much taken for granted, that we fail to notice their power. You might be asking why you aren’t happy and at peace, why you feel anxious or insecure, stuck in the past, or limited in your creativity.
Well, the answer is right under your nose, closer than you would ever imagine. Isn’t that amazing? And here it is:
What you are interested in is what is created in your life.
“Interest” – not a particularly sexy word, but its power is huge. When you are interested in something, it attracts you, draws your attention, and arouses your curiosity. You are engaged and involved with it (like my new puppy who keeps stealing my socks).
And interest is always happening. In any moment, your attention is somewhere. What are you interested in – right now?
The Tunnel Vision of Habits
Most of us have developed habits that determine what we are interested in. If you are prone to feeling tense and agitated, you will be interested in fearful thoughts. If personal drama is compelling to you, you will foster these stories through gossip and internal monologues. If you are bent on avoiding painful or challenging feelings, you will be interested in compulsively shopping, drinking, socializing, texting, working – anything but being still.
And if you are convinced that who you are is insufficient, limited, and needing approval, your attention will be squarely on what you lack and need – not on the fullness of wonder and possibility.
If you feed fear, drama, avoidance, or neediness, what will be the result? A life that manifests fear, drama, avoidance, or neediness. Be brave, and check it out in your own experience. What are you interested in?
The Dynamics of Desire
When you take an honest look, you might discover that what you are interested in is not what you really want. You want peace and ease, yet, in reality, you promote conflict and division within yourself and your relationships. You want contentment, but you foster sadness and regret. You want to express yourself fully, yet you actually stunt creative impulses.
Where your interest goes, especially if you are acting out habits, creates an environment that keeps you mired in discontent and limitation, walled off from your deepest heart desire.
What to you really want – and what are you interested in?
If these are not aligned, then something needs to change or things will stay exactly as they are. You are being asked to shake up your familiar ways of being. And if these aren’t working for you anyway, what do you have to lose?
The Sacred Shift
As you realize what you have been focusing your precious attention on, you stand at the precipice of making a sacred choice:
- Do you want to know your true magnificence?
- Do you want the pain to stop?
- Do you want to realize that you are inseparable from peace, love, and fulfillment?
Then lose interest in stories, needs, behaviors, thoughts, emotions, physical sensations – these are all objects that come and go. They arise and pass on, proving they are temporary, unreal, and far from the truth of you.
When you buy into them, they create an illusion of who you think you are. But they lead to false identities that cause suffering and mask the purity and freshness of now.
Instead, become very interested in the space of awareness in which these objects appear. Realize that before any idea, emotion, or event, there is you, aware and alive. How could you perceive any object without first being aware of it?
Be interested in the fact that you are aware, now, right in this moment. As awareness, do you resist anything? Is there a problem? Are you happy?
Let your interest rest in awareness. There is a natural intelligence that will guide you to do exactly what you need to do. You can trust that thoughts will appear when required by the situation. You realize you don’t have to spend your energy trying to figure anything out.
If you are suffering, take a look to see what you are actually interested in. Then refocus to simply being aware. Be willing to let go of familiar ideas of who you are and discover unfathomable peace, intimacy beyond words, and unbounded happiness – right here.
What do you discover when you recognize where your interest is going? What do you really want? I’d love to hear…
Haider Asif says
Lovely friend Gail Brenner
This post is as sweet as you. These torch-lighting & fruit-bearing words will bring many important improvements in my future.
Love to you.
Gail Brenner says
Beautiful words, Haider. Many thanks and much love…
Vernessie says
WOW that is confirmation for what I have be dwelling on this past weekend.
Thank You,
Vernessie
Gail Brenner says
Hi Vernessie,
It’s wonderful to get confirmation for what we already know to be true.
Love…
tomi says
your words shift me to the present moment, peace, awareness
Gail Brenner says
Yes, Tomi! Peace is here. In fact, you can’t be one millimeter away from it. It is your nature to be totally accepting of things as they are. We lose that understanding when the mind gets caught up in dramas and agitation. But that sacred choice is always available. To here, to presence, to peace.
Tatiana says
great point! I am in a life transition and am very ‘interested’ in a lot of new things entering my life in the near future!It takes conscious practice, possibly some journaling or morning positive thoughts to keep this at the forefront. Meaningful goal setting, overcoming fear, setting healthy boundaries – it is an active process, indeed. thanks for this article, it is very helpful..
Gail Brenner says
This is a great point, Tatiana. You are discovering the power of paying attention. If your goals are to accomplish tasks and move through your fears, then these won’t happen unless you pay attention to them. Why? Because conditioning diverts our attention. There is no substitute for the conscious life. Enjoy!
Lisa Kuzak says
Hi Gail,
I spend a lot of time resisting and resenting the circumstances of my life. I desire stillness and peace and a slow and unstructured pace, living in simplicity and creative inspiration. I keep trying to just let go into the fray of this busy, disjointed life, but it feels.
like a disservice to myself and saddens me.
Gail Brenner says
Hi Lisa,
I hear you. Sometimes it helps to hit bottom and be totally fed up before we are willing to listen to the truth. Clearly, your truth is speaking to you – stillness, peace, simplicity. It sounds lovely and relaxed, and for some reason it hasn’t been your time to listen and make a shift.
Maybe now? Try it little by little. Rather than letting go into your busy life, let go of your busy life. Not for always, but just in this moment, and this, and this…
Dig in deep and find the courage. I know it’s in there. And in the meantime, be kind to yourself. Who can say when it will be your time?
In love and support….
Sandra Pawula says
Gail,
I loved these insights in particular: “There is a natural intelligence that will guide you to do exactly what you need to do. …You realize you don’t have to spend your energy trying to figure anything out.” Because people often worry what will happen if they let go of the thinking. It really will be alright!
I see how my interest has focused on anxiety, worry, and fear but I’ve been shifting that and it feels wonderful! Your guidelines are precisely the way to go.
Gail Brenner says
That has been my experience, too, Sandra, that thinking isn’t needed. We think it is (pun intended), but when the whole swirl of thoughts is put down, reality flows just fine. In fact, it is the thoughts that brings suffering, conflict, and dissatisfaction.
It’s so simple, as you are discovering – less interest on anxiety and worry = wonderful living!
Galen Pearl says
I have been watching myself return again and again to a story that began in the summer. The triggering event itself is long past, but the ripples continue, and I continue to add to them with my own “interest.” I have let go of this many times like pushing the wave out, only to have it wash back on the shore. This is where my practice is right now, where my edge is, where my lesson is, so I sit with it and breathe.
Gail Brenner says
So beautiful to share this, Galen. Haven’t we all been there – feeding stories even though we know it doesn’t serve? I know I have.
The wave may come back, but each time we let go, there is a softening and dissolution, even if it is subtle. My experience has been that even the most challenging thought patterns eventually give way to the power of presence.
Alex says
My interests reveal a self always worried about improving itself, always discontented, dreaming the life I idealize, trying to escape the emptiness of the present.
Gail Brenner says
Welcome to you, Alex, and thank you for your comment.
A self trying to improve itself – I know that one well. And all that does is delay happiness for some future time, which may never come. And it is a great starting point to realize that that is what is happening.
So if you aren’t interested in future improvements and dreams, then what? Your attention rests here, in presence. It sounds like when that happens, you don’t like what you see or feel. This is called resistance. So whatever you notice that is arising in the present moment, see it and lose interest in that also. And if you have a reaction to it, lose interest in that, too.
Take the metaphor of clouds and sky. Whatever arises is a cloud, and you bring your attention to the expansive sky. Rest in the sky, and it doesn’t matter if clouds appear or not. Clouds are personal and problematic, and sky is impersonal and free. When you rest as presence itself, there is infinite peace.
Clare says
I recently read that ” . . . an emotion, like anger that’s an automatic response lasts just 90 seconds from the moment it’s triggered until it runs it’s course . . . when it lasts longer, which it usually does, it’s because we’ve chosen to rekindle it.” In other words, we get caught up in the storyline. When I read this, it certainly clicked and I’ve remembered it ever since, especially when I’m working to stay present. In fact, I think the concept of staying present had a new meaning; I finally sort of got it.
Gail Brenner says
Thanks for this, Clare. It is my point exactly. We can rekindle anger by staying involved in the story line. And if we choose not to do that. our attention is available and freed up. Where does it go? Notice that in every moment, you are aware. You might be aware of something – a thought or feeling, but if you take away the “thing,” there is just awareness. This is presence. Try putting your attention here, and explore what that is like. Is there any problem when your attention is on awareness – and not on thoughts and feelings? This is the path to freedom.
Nor Aziah says
Hi Gail,
Thank you for this beautiful and awakening post. It makes me realize that we don’t always focus on what we really want. Instead, we sometimes focus our mind on what could go wrong; our fear. I ought to be more aware of where my mind is focusing on; the success or the failure. Mistakes and failure is just part of the journey that provides us lessons to learn from and make us stronger. While success is the true destination we are aiming for. I guess where we are focusing on is where we will end up.
Thank you again Gail for this sweet reminder.
Gail Brenner says
Hi Nor,
Where we are focusing is where we are and also where we will end up. That is why noticing what you are focusing on is so critical. It gives you options and allows you to see that happiness is possible. Most minds will run wild, thinking all sorts of scary and sad thoughts. There are not to be believed. Let your focus rest on the spaciousness that is always here and the thoughts will be just like clouds passing in the sky.
Love…