“You can become blind by seeing each day as a similar one. Each day is a different one, each day brings a miracle of its own. It’s just a matter of paying attention to this miracle.”
~Paulo Coelho
It descends like a cloud before you know it. Your mind turns to mush. You stare into space. Your focus goes out the window. Your body feels like a heavy sack. And there you are…bored out of your mind.
Boredom is one of those experiences that dulls your engagement with life. It’s a mindless state that blocks your creativity, enthusiasm, and interest. As teacher Francis Lucille says, it’s a rejection of the present moment.
Let boredom go unchecked, and who knows how long you’ll sit there in a fog. But come alive to your boredom, and everything changes in less than a nanosecond.
Waking Up to Boredom
As paradoxical as it might sound, what if you got interested in your experience of boredom? Instead of being bored, you shift your attention away from boredom to being here, aware in this present moment.
Instead of being lost, now you can study what you’re experiencing. And that’s when things get interesting.
Say you’re fascinated by Josephine Bonaparte, wife of Napolean (like I am). What do you do with that passion? You read everything about her. You become knowledgeable about the social and historical context in which she lived. You learn about the personalities of the people in her life and the roles thay played.
You put your thirst for information into practice.
Now, what if you found your own experience of boredom to be equally fascinating? You might ask questions like:
- What is happening in my mind and thought process when I’m bored?
- What emotions are present, maybe suppressed by the boredom? (for example, fear or anger)
- What does my body feel like when I’m bored?
- What happens to my energy?
- What do I feel like doing or not doing when I’m bored?
- How do I show up in my relationships?
- What triggers boredom?
Now that you’ve shown interest in boredom, where did it go? When you’re fascinated by boredom, it just doesn’t trap you anymore.
Finding Your Aliveness Again
This post was inspired by my own experience being bored while I was trying to write it. I “woke up” to realize I had shut down and somehow disappeared. But instantaneously, I was back!
I took a breath and said, “Hello, boredom.” Then I reconnected with my desire to communicate what would be most helpful for you, the lovely one reading this.
When you let boredom have its way with you, you’re consumed by it. But when you step back to find some space from it, all of a sudden you’ve found your aliveness again. It’s always been here, only temporarily obscured.
No longer stuck in the cloud of boredom, you’ve accessed a new, expanded state of consciousness—you might call it clarity. Fresh options become apparent that before were hidden.
In your full aliveness, what are you moved to do? What is most vital to you in this moment? What is calling you?
Next time you’re bored, remember this: the aliveness that is you is here, so incredibly present, overflowing everywhere. You’re just a shift of attention away. Wake up to the moments of your life, and see what begins to unfold…
What About You?
What do you notice when you come alive to boredom? I’d love to hear… And if you’re reading this by email, please click here to comment.
Always in love,
Gail
Note: I’ll be offering a half-day retreat on October 18 in Santa Barbara. Please click here for details and to register.
image credit
Silvia says
Hi, Gail. Thank you for your post. It’s really useful.
I think boredom is becoming a bigger issue due to the growing over-stimulation. At this point, people can’t stand anymore to be without something to do, somewhere to go. The need to get “entertained” is as big and compulsive for the mind as the aversion to be quiet. I observed this in myself and discovered that it was a totally unconscious behavior. But, even when I am able to observe it and make it conscious, there is a level where it persists and always comes back.
I believe the only solution is to be more present, to increase the level of conscience until it become possible to accept, include, and transcend, and to do it again and again…
Any advice?
Gail Brenner says
I completely agree, Silvia. Our culture encourages a habit of always being entertained, which is at odds with being comfortable just being still.
So even in the face of these societal pressures, we are asked to go inside and see for ourselves what we really want, which takes courage and focus. The Truth is always here, no matter how distracted we are. Something within us knows it, and knows when we’ve missed it. We feel a subtle feeling of agitation that things are not okay, that something needs to be fixed or improved. And we just know that there is something else besides the everyday objects in the material world. This can be trusted.
Habits can be very strong, especially when reinforced from outside us. So yes, over and over, rinse and repeat, accept and include. In any moment of suffering, bring awareness to it and find peace. It doesn’t matter how many times this needs to happen. When a challenging feeling returns, it’s not a problem. It’s simply another opportunity to gracefully return to presence.
Sharon Greenlee says
I did enjoy your article…I wonder how you distinguish “boredom” from a minor surge of depression? ‘boredom’ is defined as: weariness caused by dull, tiresome people or events”. I didn’t hear you feeling that way about writing your article. I have often had ‘the Sundays’. It began at childhood…just not knowing what to do with myself on Sunday… feeling a bit of uneasiness, sadness, not wanting to do anything and forcing myself when I did…just not feeling like ME. I give total Thanks that I don’t live with depression though I have learned to listen and love myself through “the Sundays” (even when they come on Thursday morning). ;)…Love your work…Sharon Greenlee
Gail Brenner says
Thanks so much for your comment, Sharon. Whether you call it boredom or a minor surge of depression, what is being asked for is the same—bringing your attention to what’s actually happening so you can come alive to it. Inquiry does that. If you start asking questions about your experience from a place of curiosity, all of sudden what was dull is now much more interesting.
The shift you describe about the “Sundays” is just that. You recognized the feelings and brought acceptance to them.
Wonderful to hear from you…
Niro says
This article is very useful for me.
Because all these days i felt very bored and wondering that there’s nothing interesting in my life. I don’t have much friends talk or go out with here. There language is different and cultures are different. Always i stay @ home and keep on reading books or study for my exam and go for tuition. I have left school.. and don’t know what to do next till i go to a university or to do some course and go to work.. Very boring my life is..
I’ll try to find aliveness again……
Gail Brenner says
That is the key, Niro – to find aliveness. Follow the things you are passionate about. Come from a place that is already whole in you as you look at situations in the world. That shift to being aware, awake, and alive is always possible in any moment.
Brenda says
Just like you said! Here I was, lying on the couch. Feeling all the normal effects of boredom ….low, depressed, feeling sorry for myself, questioning if I should have retired…my mind wandering way from anything present.
Checked my iPad and there you were. Read your article, a burst of NOW came over me…looked at my fabulous two dogs who always wait patiently for me…just back from a great autumn walk by the lake with smiling doggies by my side. It is always a choice but so often I seem to forget I have one. Thank you for the reminder. Brenda
Gail Brenner says
Beautiful, Brenda! I love that the timing was perfect…
Bernardo says
hi Gail : interesting your view about being mindful about boredom.
Boredom is word that does not have a place in my world.
Good to hear from you.
xoxo
Gail Brenner says
Wonderful, Bernardo. Great to hear from you, too!
Pam says
Thanks Gail! I remember back a few years ago dealing with boredom, I would fall into a slight depression. Now that I meditate I welcome that moment where I do have time for myself so I can meditate. It has totally transformed my life. I always feel fresh and alive after a few minutes of meditation. I have no worrys of depression creeping over me which that in itself is wonderful. Take care. Pam. xx
Gail Brenner says
I’ve had that experience, too, Pam. Boredom hangs around a while and somehow seeps into mild depression. Waking up to all of it is the key, as you have found. The awareness of meditation returns our attention to the ever-present aliveness that is always here.
Pam says
Gail I need some advice from you. This may be off topic or not. I’m stuck in a situation which still stems from my fathers death. He died of ALS or Lou Gehrig Disease ten years ago. This is still effecting me today. My husband has lost ten lbs and a good reason for it. We are putting an addition on our cottage. My dad lost a lot of weight with that disease. I can’t see to think logical on this weight lost for my husband and I keep thinking there is more to his weight loss and there is a disease behind it. People also that we know keep commenting on his weight loss. Please give me some advice on how I can correct my thinking. Thank you so much! I just need peace of mind.
Gail Brenner says
Hi Pam,
It sounds to me like a first step would be a thorough medical evaluation. I understand that this is scary for you and appreciate the reasons for your fear. We can’t talk about “correcting your thinking” until we know for sure what is going on for him. I know you think it is stress from the renovation you are doing, and hopefully that is the case. Fear is about the unknown, so gain as much accurate information as you can.
manik nath says
Hi dear Gail, it is feel like being blessed ,as like ‘mother’ who does the noblest deed in this world without any selfishness. thus I feel the way as I found myself like a lighting candle in the dark of my life, every time I read your speeches which is full of energy and peacefulness. I hope everybody has found their ways to deal with their every challenges of life offers. yes, for me it is like blessed. And I would say it is really works.
with a lot of loving wishes for you!!!!
Thank You!!!
Gail Brenner says
Love right back to you, Manik. I’m so happy for you!